I would just like to say about the above advert, that i receive no money for it, but it is a cause i think is worth fighting, so, what do you say? give it a chance.

Dennis Walters, this is your life

Dennis Walters was born in Perth, Australia, on the 29th of February 1976. His parents were both workers in the tourism industry, and that is how they met each other, at the 1973 Perth tourism industry AGM. His father ran a tour bus that would go into the outback so that people from the civilized western world could laugh at the way the aborigines lived. Of course, the aborigines got their own back when the bus broke down (fairly often, if Dennis' mother is to be believed) and they could laugh at the way the civilized people's skin would peel under the hot sun.

His mother worked in a bar, no not a strip club, she was the cabaret act for Perth's biggest bar. So big that locals would completely avoid it, it having been taken over by the tourism industry eons ago. It was from his mother that Dennis received his rhythm skills. He would spend many nights of his young life while his father was out with his tours watching his mother perform. He took a special interest in her drummer.

Dennis, and his mother's drummer became more than friends, they developed a very special relationship, that of teacher and pupil. Dennis soon became a whiz at the drums, but there soon became a problem. Dennis' father had made a deal with the Australian mafia to get a new bus, but he couldn't afford to keep paying them, so at the age of 12 he moved to a small unknown English village known as tiddlywinks-upon-sea. He attended the local high school and met a boy called Toby Karn. At the age of 14, the Australian mafia found Dennis' dad, and killed him, while he was having sex with his wife, the bullet had to go through her to get to him. Dennis then lived with nuns for 2 years before they kicked him out because he was a guy and guy's don't make very good nuns.

He joined Toby's band, made very little money, ran away to Australia and founded another band with his ex-drum teacher, who died before the first single was released. Walters' spent 6 years touring Australia with not real people before he realized that Australia just wasn't ready for hymns to be updated and given backing sounds from the Australian Grand Prix, as well as having a frog saying "Ribbet, God" every 30 seconds. He described his band as "experimental" and his frog as "his only friend". He very recently left the band when he got arrested in the UK for murder, and they won't let him rejoin the band. He has since then taken a job as drummer with tbc, his first band. 

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copyright © 2002 Murray Barnes 

All names and characters in this website are entirely fictional. Any coincidences between your name and one that is on this website is just that, a coincidence, and if you are not careful, I will sue you for stealing one of my names. Thanks must go to: Stephanie Roberts for the excellent work you have done promoting this website; Me, for building this website; The entirely fictional cast of tbc for being entirely fictional and allowing me to write about them. If you spot an error anywhere on this website, don't hesitate to get in contact with our webmaster. And finally, thanks to you, my public for being there and reading this website.

Last modified: September 14, 2002

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